Dear King

Dear King -

Special Agent Ignitz reporting in.

Status:
Necklace of Glitter: 22% found (or so)

I have successfully infiltrated (igfiltrated.. haha) my way into a party of non-gnomes (I know) that are delving into the banewarrens. I was planning to do above ground reconnoitering first, but these guys were heading directly in thus I thought it would be my best chance to cover this ground. Besides, I think I have a distinct chance for steamy love with the elf female (for covert information gathering purposes only of course (man.. what I dont do for this job)).

This party has told me that they have joined forces with two previous Ig clan members - both of which have met an unhealthy demise. I was skeptical at first, but they sold me the gear of one of them and indeed (igdeed.. haha) all indications (igdications!) were that he was an Ig clan member. I'd formally like to report the death of Igbert and with less confidence, Igbot.

This group is unorthodox but so far has been relatively effective.

The barbarian is named DeathSpank. I do not know what that means but it should me "I drool alot" - I've learned well not to stand under him.

There is also the aforementioned female elf bard. She has excellent skills at information ("ig-fo-mation") gathering and a clear weakness for gnome males with sinewy yet powerful bodies (woe is myah).

The wizard always wears a hood and I must say is sorta freaking me out.

The paladin always (get this) rides his horse inside the dungeon. If I hadn't almost been trampled a few dozen times this would be crazy funny. Anyone looking to follow us will have
*no* problem - trust me. I'm all about covering our tracks but picking up horse doo is not in
the job description.

The cleric is (like most clerics) a bit religious. He won't stop talking about God this and God that. I'm like "Dude - heal the gnome and you'll get home" but scarcely a moment goes by without his ranting.

We have so far encountered an odd group of enemies. A disappearing female and a group of werewolves. I was able to land a good few attacks on the werewolves and dispatch at least one
myself. The paladin (yah, the guy on the horse) stabbed the woman pretty darn hard and she
poofed like, well, something that really poofs.

Later, amidst an attempt to disarm a trap, the rope that the others igsisted on putting on me mysteriously got tugged and my foot set off the trap. I was mystically transported across the dungeon directly above a nasty pit. Luckily my gnome-like refexes (given I'm a gnome, its good thing I have gnome-like reflexes) came into play and I was able to grasp the side of the pit igstead of falling to my demise.

Shooken from the experience and despite knowing my way back, I somehow thought I was actually "in" (yeah, ig) the pit when I was actually only standing next to it. This foul illusion magic kept me under its spell thus I started yelling for the party to come find me. Score one for me - it worked like a charm and were happily reunited.

Next week I'm hoping to ig-ig-ig-crease the finding of the necklace to at least 30%.

Cya King and say hi to Mrs. King.
Ig